And so it continues - Part 2

In part 1 I told yall that Jaime deserved to have her story told. You must be asking why I think Jaime is so special. What did she do to deserve any story. I think she would like people to know why she behaved, acted and reacted the she did during her life.
The beginning of the continued cycle really began before Jaime was even a thought. Jaime's mother was young, 16yrs old when she met and was whoo'd by a 42yrs. man. He promised her a better life than that of a very poor sharecropper's daughter. Her mother ran away with the older man, only to quickly experience out of the frying pan, into the fire. The man who was to save her, only used her to beat on, to sell to other men and in order to ensure she remained with him, he introduced this unhappy, scared, girl to the wonders of heroin. He taught her how to give herself the shots. In the 1950's, there was no hope for her escape. Soon this teenager girl was turning tricks to pay for her growing habit as well as for that of this leach of a human being who preyed on this helpless girl. He brought her to Texas, away from her family, her familiar surroundings, her only means of a possible escape. And so it continued, the cycle began. Eventually, Jaime was born, to a addict mother, and unknown John. Jaime's mother was useless to the old man by the time Jaime was born. He left her with a baby, a habit, and no hope. Jaime was born in the early 1980's. Times were better for a person to get help, but drug addicts were not considered top priority. I know this part of Jaime's life because she felt the need to tell me. She wanted me to understand why she made some of the choices she was making. Jaime continued to tell me... Jaime was never in one place too long, a junkie can't pay the rent, a landlord doesn't care about moving a junkie to the streets. Jaime says she remembered the first time an old man touched her, how he smelled, how his hands were dirty and rough, how he told her to shut up, how her mother asked Jaime to be a "good girl" and not be rude to the old man with the drug she was willing to give her daughter away for if not only a few minutes for. Jaime said she learned quickly as a little 4-5yrs girl to stay hidden, don't let the men see her, "don't expect momma to protect me" she said one of her first memories of her mother's drug problem was her mother sitting on the bathroom floor, sobbing, sweating, rocking as she would her daughter is she knew how to be a mother. Jaime said she was frightened because her mother suddenly fell over, and began to shake violently. Jaime said she ran to the neighbors in the shanty apartment to get help for her sick mother. Jaime was too young to understand the effects of with drawls. This was the first time child services became involved in this little girl's nightmare. Jaime's momma got "well", and got Jaime back. Jaime to the last time I saw her swore her mother loved her. Jaime continues her story, even for me I find it hard not want to slap her mother to this very day. Jaime tells me not too long after her terrifying ordeal, her mother began to take her "medicine" again. Jaime was 6yrs. old the first time her mother decided Jaime was old enough to help her. Jaime was taught at 6yrs old to tie her mother's arm off, with anything available, to load the syringe and to shoot the liquid hell called heroin into her mother's arm. Her mother told Jaime if she didn't do it right, if she didn't help her mother with this ritual, her mother would die, and Jaime would have no where to go. For one moment shut your eyes and imagine your 6yrs, child, niece, grandson hearing those words, seeing the effects of the shot, seeing the blood come back through the syringe. We imagine for one moment, this was a huge part of Jaime's life. I asked Jaime how she felt, now that she is grown with babies of her own, tears came to her eyes, she hung her head, and she softly said "I hate her for that, why me?" My heart broke for her, I wanted to hug her and make the memories go away. But, it was too late. Jaime was taken way from the only person she had really known to love, several more times, each time the state would allow her to go home, and each time her mother would relapse often at the expense of her daughter. Jaime learned early how to cook for herself and her mother, how to hustle money from the old men without selling her body, how to survive in the roughest neighborhoods where she was the minority, where she was beat up for walking down the street, and being white. She learned that CPS was not one to help her, but to take her from the mother that needed her. Jaime was taken was when she was 14yrs. old from her mother yet again, but this time Jaime was pregnant. Jaime said she believed CPS would have to let her go, if she had a baby. Jaime's eye's lit up as she spoke about her baby girl. Jaime had her baby while she herself was in foster care. The day she had her baby the state allowed her to see her baby then they took her baby from her. Jaime said she cryed and screamed the day they took her baby girl who she named Allison. Jaime was resourceful, a life on the streets had taught her well, she knew how to work the system. She played the game so well, she convinced the social worker she would not run away from the foster home, she learned where her baby girl was, she had refused to sign her away. Allison was the one person in this world who would love her, and not hurt her. Jaime took the first opportunity, she ran, and she ran straight to her baby girl. Jaime took her baby and ran again. Jaime ran to her mother. Jaime's mother tried to help, tried to hide her, tried to tell the state she was not longer a danger to her daughter. They took Jaime's baby again, however, through time and effort Jaime had her baby returned to her, and she was taken out of the system. Jaime loved Allison, yet, Jaime had never been mothered, she had never been rocked, she had never known the safety of one home. Jaime kept Allison, and tried to share her with the baby's daddy, only to have the daddy critically hurt in an accident, and he has been and still is basically brain dead. Allison's father's sister,(aunt) would help Jaime with Allison, the aunt loved Allison, but Jaime could not bear to give her baby girl away.
Part 3 to follow.......